A month later she calls me and tells me that the date is in 3 days. She picks me up and we go out to buy a dress for her and me. I'm getting the impression that this is all for real. And soon she did marry Brown Angel. We moved into the house at the top of the street. This is not a happy ending. It's the start of more awful times.

Brown Angel and my Mom were definitely on drugs. I could smell pot in the air at night and could see my Mother popping pills in the morning. This was the day to day life at our house. Brown Angel couldn't keep a job. My Mother worked day and night to support us. Soon summer came and I found myself at home with Brown Angel. He made me nervous. I didn't feel that good around him. He often spoke about weird things and had strange guys over visiting. I think he was a drug dealer. He would put his finger over my mouth and tell me to never say anything. I would just keep quiet. I was scared of him. His look was frightening to me. The tattoos that were all over him actually gave me fear. Even his fingers were tattooed. I don't know what initially made me not like him, but I felt embarrassment around him. My friends were scared of him. No one would let their daughters stay over night once they saw this guy.

One night it was very hot. I was still in my bathing suit, because I had gone swimming at a neighbor's house earlier. I was watching Hart to Hart on Television. My Mom was at work. It was just me and Brown Angel. I noticed he was looking somewhat nervous. I was not sure why, but I thought maybe he was high on some drug. I was lying down on my stomach and watched TV. Half way through the show he came up to me and put his knee on my back. He placed his fingers in my privates. He molested me and I could not scream. His weight on my back was taking my air. I was scared and didn't know what to do. He could easily over power me. I was only Twelve years old. He stopped and took his knee off my back. I got up immediately and ran to my bedroom. I placed a chair under the door knob so that he could not open it. My heart beat fast, my ears rang loud, and I paced back and forth. I anticipated jumping out of the window. I wrote a letter to my mother and un-wedged the chair from the door. I quickly taped it to the outside of my bedroom door. I saw him coming and hurried back inside and placed the chair back under the door knob.

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